Chapter 5
Good Morning to this week 5 of 2023
The biblical principles of resilience ultimately show us the quality of our faith in the Lord. Hard times reveal to us our hearts and the depth of our faith in God. Are we like waves in the ocean or vapor in the wind, easily tossed and blown away? Or are we rooted in God in our faith?
He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way. Psalm 25.9
I look through a book with some life hacks. Why do some have resilience, or in certain situations – while others don’t. The title looked promising and for sure has some nuggets within the many lines. Here a few quotes to start your week!
In Do Hard Things, Steve Magness beautifully and persuasively reimagines our understanding of toughness. Toughness has long been held as the key to overcoming a challenge and achieving greatness, whether it is on the sports field, at a boardroom, or at the dining room table. Yet, the prevailing model has promoted a mentality based on fear, false bravado, and hiding any sign of weakness. In other words, the old model of toughness has failed us.
- Pillar 1- Ditch the Façade, Embrace Reality
- Pillar 2- Listen to Your Body
- Pillar 3- Respond, Instead of React
- Pillar 4- Transcend Discomfort
Toughness is having the space to make the right choice under discomfort.
Instead of wrestling the giant monster, start with the smallest item that you can have control over that’s related to the problem. Is it your breath? Can you intentionally slow your breathing down? Or maybe it’s something as simple as showing up on time or getting through the first mile of your marathon.”
The old model of toughness, in essence, throws people into the deep end of the pool but forgets that we need to first teach people how to swim.
“It’s training the mind to handle uncertainty long enough so that you can nudge or guide your response in the right direction. To create space so that you don’t jump straight from unease to the quickest possible solution, but to the “correct” one. The first step in redefining toughness is to understand where we went wrong, why bulldozing through often leads to a worse outcome.”
Research consistently shows that tougher individuals are able to perceive stressful situations as challenges instead of threats. A challenge is something that’s difficult, but manageable. On the other hand, a threat is something we’re just trying to survive, to get through. This difference in appraisals isn’t because of an unshakable confidence or because tougher individuals downplay the difficulty. Rather, those who can see situations as a challenge developed the ability to quickly and accurately assess the situation and their ability to cope with”
Real toughness resides in being humble and wise enough to acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses. To find the right point of risk versus reward, to balance upon the expectations-versus-demands scale.”
The lesson wasn’t that we just need to put people in difficult spots and force them to deal with adversity. We need to teach them how to navigate the discomfort they’ll soon face.”
Negative thoughts of quitting are normal. They don’t mean you are weak. They represent your mind trying to protect you.”
We’ve demonised doubt. Showing any weakness, having any hesitation, is a sure sign that you don’t deserve the raise. Humility and vulnerability are signs that you can’t handle “tough” situations.”
Toughness is having the space to make the right choice under discomfort.
Wishing a good start to this week!
Philemon